Patience, Teaching teens work and study skills

Thinking back to the days of studying with my friend in high school (she was the top of the class) I remember how patient she was in coming to conclusions, answering questions, and writing essays.  She was slow, meticulous, and purposeful.  I tried to emulate her ability but I failed time and again.

Because of my impatience to get through my work I was not an excellent student just an average student.  To this day I have to force myself to slow down and accomplish the same amount of work in a little more time but with much more affective results.

So, I'm probably the last person to teach my son patience.  That doesn't mean I'm not going to try.

We live in a fast-paced world:  fast food, fast internet, fast games, fast speed limits, etc.  It wasn't until I listened to my son complain for the millionth time about how long it takes to complete his math lessons that I finally understood the real problem.

It's not so much the time it takes but that school was too easy for him in elementary.  He loved math, sped through the lessons, then he'd rush out to play or get on the computer.  He wasn't required to write as much as he is now and answering questions was much easier and quicker.

Now school is more intricate, more detailed, and more is expected of him.  He doesn't like it!  None of us really do for that matter.  We all like simple and uncomplicated.  We want reward and gratification with as little effort as possible.

Can you imagine the patience it would take from us to trek across the country in a covered wagon, and then wait for papa to build a house so you don't have to live in a dugout?  Or waiting for mama to churn the milk for butter and cheese?  How about waiting for your socks to mended, or new ones to be knitted?  It's romantic to believe we could handle it, but I don't think that is the case.

We are a generation, and we're raising the next generation, that just doesn't like to slow down. We have the mindset ~ the faster, the better. We need to remember and teach our teens sometimes slow and steady really does win the race.

So I stopped my son just before the frustration could take hold.  I told him it was like he was walking along a path, saw a 20 MPH sign, and thought he should try to speed up to that limit.  It's just not possible.  The sign is for the cars on the street not for pedestrians walking on the sidewalk.  He needs to slow down, work at his own pace, and take one step at a time.

The minute the words were out of my mouth a light went on behind my son's eyes.  He stared at me a moment, his lips in the classic O, as the logic slowly sank in.  He returned to his work still having the occasional issue of hurrying through his lesson, but a little reminder now and then to slow down helped him mightily.

Getting a teen to slow their motor is difficult, but hey it's not that easy for us either.  I don't want to even imagine how many trips to the well I'd have to make, or how long it would take to heat up the water just to fill a bath like in the "good ol' days".  Thank heaven for modern conveniences and those who were as impatient as I am to invent them for us.

What about your teen, is his or her motor revving faster than it needs to?  Do they need to learn patience in their work and study habits?

I'm linking up with Finishing Strong from iHomeschool Network. I've been featured in the past and have learned so much from others who are homeschooling through the Middle and High School Years. Go on over and see who else is joining, or link up your own post.

photo credit: Rich Anderson

 

Do more than just enough

As a single parent my son witnesses firsthand how I struggle to balance work and home.  Although he "gets it" it's still not easy for him to accept.  Every so often he complains that I don't make enough time to play, and as much as I would love to spend every waking moment talking and playing with him, it just isn't possible.

Most of our days it's just he and I; there's no dad coming home after work, no friends knocking on the door after school.  We've talked about the time we each need to put into our respective work, his education and my job.  There are goals we're each striving for.

Still, he asks, "What's the purpose?"

He also asks, "Why do I need to learn Math?  Isn't that why they invented calculators."  Or  "Why do I need to learn Grammar?  I don't want to be a writer."  Or  "Why do I need to take the trash out or empty the dishwasher EVERY day?"

It makes perfect sense in his young mind to use the technology provided to take short-cuts.  Most teens don't comprehend the daily grind that we as adults have learned to accept.  They are continually trying to break free of what they perceive to be boring and mundane.

It's these moments that I wonder what happened to the little boy who would push a chair up to the kitchen counter and awkwardly crawl on it to help me while I was baking or cooking.

Where did the child go who got on his knees next to me in the garden to plant seeds or pull weeds?

I remember the laughs and stories we shared over a basket of towels and how the tickle monster would make numerous visit throughout the day.

Although those days are long gone and my little boy has grown into an independent young man whose only interest is his basic need to eat, sleep, and be entertained, I consistently need to remind him to be diligent and do more than just enough. 

Take a lesson from the ants, you lazybones.   Learn from their ways and become wise!   Proverbs 6:6

What about you, are you dealing with a defiant teen?



photo credit: Paxson Woelber

Teens and sleep, are they getting enough?

The older my son gets the more I forget he's still experiencing growth spurts.  He's taken over many of the duties I used to perform which gave me free access to his body.  (Thank heaven!)  So I don't notice most of the changes going on, except in his voice, facial hair, height, and clothing sizes.

The only thing not changed over these many years is his attitude.  I can tell when he hasn't been eating well or getting enough rest.  Just like when he was younger there are temper tantrums and talking back episodes that indicate a problem.

Some would say this is normal for teenagers because they are trying to "find themselves" or learning independence.  But I say hogwash, when this happens I think if my teen needs to find anything it's respect and a nap.

I've tried to be lenient about bed time on the weekends, but Monday mornings just turned into a battle ground.  I've even allowed all night movie nights once every few years, and that is only if I'm prepared for the consequences.  It will take my son at least three days of regular sleep to make up for those nights.

What do you think, are teens getting enough rest?

photo credit: Racchio

Have a Math Game Day

Do your children hate worksheets as much as my son?

He groans and grumbles, takes an inordinate amount of time to complete them, and has shed numerous tears over them.  It only took me a year and half to figure out that I was beating my head against a brick wall by expecting my son to complete worksheets.  Now that he is able to do more of his schoolwork independently, worksheets have created complete chaos to our schedule.

For years I've been collecting free resources through free printables, notebooking, and lapbooking, but every time I present them to my son he turns up his little nose.  So to break up the monotony of worksheets I came up with Math Game Day.

He gets to choose either Dominoes, dice, playing cards without the face cards, or Cribbage.

With Dominoes my son picks one, turns it over, then writes the numbers and adds, subtracts, multiplies, or divides.  The same thing is done with the playing cards, but I make two piles with the cards.  Cribbage is a card game my mother taught my sisters and I when we were very young.  It’s a wonderful game for practicing math facts.

The dice are more commonly chosen and are his favorite because he loves throwing them.  We start with just two dice for about 5 min.  He throws them, writes, and computes.  Then I'll add two more dice to the game.  For another 5 min. my son throws, writes down combinations of two number problems.  Finally, I add the last two dice for three number problems.

I keep this “play” time short so he doesn’t get bored, and we occasionally spice things up with odd number of dice.  He responds so much better to this kind of math.

Do you have any other ideas for creative, fun learning?

photo credit: Lyn Lomasi

"I am not your dictionary"

"Mom, what does this word mean?"

"Mom, I don't understand what this is."

"Mom, how do you spell this word?"

"Son, you have a book right next to you with everything you're looking for in it.  It's got crisp, brand new pages that are just yearning to be leafed through.  Do you know what that book is?"

Although it warms my heart my son thinks I'm smarter than anyone else in the world and I'm pleased as punch he comes to me with all his problems and questions, but I'm not his dictionary, thesaurus, atlas, etc.

I paid a pretty good amount of money over the past several years for my son to have the resources he needs to find out whatever he wants, but he refuses to use them.

At this age it's not uncommon for the laundry basket to sit empty with a pile of dirty clothes next to it, clean socks left in a heap on top of the dresser, and the strange brush next to his toilet looks as pristine as the day it came home from the store.   But it's the perfect age to teach once and for all where, when, and how to use all the resources available to my Middle School child.

Now you might have a child who reads an encyclopedia for pleasure, but I don't.  When he was younger I would sit next to my son and read from wonderful books.  We learned so much and his curiosity always had us searching Google or Wikipedia for more information about a subject or a person.  It would seem some of this activity would rub off on him and he would know where to go for information.

But, NOT MY SON!  Maybe it's rebellion, or maybe it's just laziness.  I don't really know, but common sense tells me this is something that can be taught.  Logic would also have me thinking this is so since his underwear is neatly placed in the drawer, or is that just because he's too embarrassed to have it laying around?

Excuse me a moment...

"Mom, why do they call it the Rock of Gibraltar, and who is Ollie North?"

"Well son, let's go find the resource that will give you the information you're looking for."

Until next time, Happy Homeschooling!

 

photo credit: crdotx

Middle school ~ Starting over

While most of you are trying to prevent homeschool burnout or counting down the days to creating this year's portfolio or taking pictures of and posting used curriculum for sale, we are starting over.

If you think I'm freaking out about that I have to tell you, YES about two months ago I was, but right now, not so much.  This is the second year we've gone through this, and after much frustration and tears I'm pretty much immune to the "freaking out" emotion.

When we started over last year, I thought I'd learned a lesson that wouldn't be repeated.  Boy was I wrong.  This year it was a little easier, but I was still upset to be experiencing the same issues as before.

So what went wrong?  Well it was a number of things that got us off to a rocky start:

• wrong curriculum
• my son wasn't ready to work independently
• he also wasn't prepared for consequences for not taking more responsibility
• my parenting style
• scheduling (I'm working more hours)
• lesson presentation
• etc, etc, etc

The first thing I did was put a stop to all schooling.  We took several weeks off just to breathe and unwind.  I took some time to deprogram the whole schooling mentality I was holding on to, and my son became a teenager right in front of my eyes.  (Seriously, at 12 years old my son should not have a mustache, talk in such a low tone, and be less than an inch shorter than me.  I'm 5'11" for heavens sake.)  But I digress...

Here's what I did after my brain was clear of all the clutter from schooling expectations.  First I looked for homeschooling bloggers with similar aged children, checked out curriculum they were using, and asked many of them if they had dealt with any of the issues I was.

What I found out was, many of them had.  Heidi shared her daughter's struggle with Math, and her advice for when curriculum just isn't working was very helpful.  Mary has a son about the same age as mine, and I've been visiting her blog to pick up a few tips from her.  She has three boys, oh my, and one is a homeschool graduate.  Then I stumbled across Rebecca's post and things started to click for me.

What was I forcing on my son just so I could boast about his education?  I forgot why I was homeschooling my son, and the benefits open to us because of this choice.  Most of all I forgot to keep God in the center and stay mindful of my calling to train up this child to know Him.

Here is our new curriculum: (some of the links below are affiliates, please read my disclosure for more info.)

Bible (30 min.) ~ Guys Life Application Study Bible NLT,  Jesus Calling: 365 Devotions For Kids,  Little Pilgrim's Progress: From John Bunyan's Classic

Math (30 min.) ~ Learning Wrap-Ups Introductory Math Kit,  flash cards, Life of Fred 3-Book Set : Kidneys, Liver, and Mineshaft (How much does my son love Life of Fred?  While I was planning his schedule he saw the books, started reading the first chapter of Kidneys, and then asked me for a piece of paper so he could figure out the problems.)

Language Arts (45 min.) ~

• English (M/W/F) - We are continuing with Rod and Staff
• Spelling - Word Roots because my son is an amazing speller and he is bored with worksheets.  This curriculum has already proven to be just the challenge he needs without the drills and tests he is used to.  I'm also impressed with the critical thinking skills my son is learning with Word Roots.
• Composition (T/TH) - Writing With Skill, Level 1 
• Handwriting -  A Reason for Handwriting

History (20-60 min.) W/F ~ The Story of the World: History for the Classical Child, Volume 3: Early Modern Times, My son loves this series, but he is not interested in completing the activities.  We have been supplementing with videos on Netflix and Theresa's suggestions.  I've also been adding biographical books we own or have found at Old Fashioned Education or Ambleside.

Geography M/T/TH (30-45 min.) ~ Cultural Geography, I won this textbook in the Mega Homeschool Giveaway three years ago.  I have been looking forward to digging into this book and I think my son will really enjoy the change of pace.  I have purchased the activities and tests to reinforce what he's learning, but we will take this as fast or slow as desired.  I also won Around the World in 180 Days in the same giveaway, and I'm hoping to work this in along the way.

Literature (60 min. ) ~ Memoria Press, plus other books from Ambleside or Old Fashioned Education.  He also has 100+ The Hardy Boys books that were given to him from a good friend.  He has really enjoyed these and will continue to read them for fun.

Computer Science ~ I have saved the best for last.  The biggest problem we've had with school work is getting my son to concentrate on anything other than computer games.  He is addicted to playing them, watching videos of others playing them, and talking incessantly about them.

I have completely given up (unless he shows interest later) on studying nature, plants, animals, the body, and any other normal science study until much later in High School.  I am choosing my battles, and this is not one I want to fight.

The only way I could see him getting interested in learning was if he could study what interests him.  I figure if he wants to play on the computer, he should know everything about them.  For this subject we have Building a PC in Easy Steps and Troubleshooting Your PC in Easy Steps.

If he wants to play on it, he has to know how to take care of it.

Later we will add Adobe Flash Professional CS5 Classroom in a Book and Head First HTML with CSS & XHTML.  If he shows an interest in having an IT career we'll add this CompTIA A+ Certification which even has a Workbook.

Now I realize this seems like a lot, but we've had one week with this curriculum.  Other than a total melt down during our second writing lesson we've had a great first week.  We are taking it slow, adjusting and tweaking as we go, and both our attitudes are more positive.

It has also helped that we are getting out and walking for half an hour every morning.  The one day we didn't was the day of the melt down.  It's amazing how a fresh look and fresh air help us see the whole picture in a better light.

What I've learned ~ It's ok to start over, throw out the curriculum, and spend a little more time in prayer.  Oh and adding a little more laughter and lightening up really helps too.

photo credit: Maryam (one bored chica)

Homeschooling a preteen who just doesn't care

I've updated this post from the archives because it is more relevant now than when I first posted it.

Our year officially started in August but since we were a little unorganized due to my work schedule, the majority of our curriculum was in boxes, and lessons were sporadic at best ~ we're basically starting over from a long extended break.

It's homeschool, so we can do that, right?

Mary wrote a post that was almost verbatim to thoughts I've been having for quite a few months.  So, I'm making a change in how we do things.  In the past I'd make a plan and schedule lessons similar to the public school method.  I was a little more flexible with time and resources, but the plan was still the same.  I’d say, “Here are your lessons, now let’s do it.”

Well, that's not working for us.

My son isn’t seeing the connection between education and real life.  I've always wanted him to be excited and interested in learning, but that's just not happening.  Then I thought of implementing an "interest led" or what is called an "unschooling" approach.  I'm not sure this would be something my son or I would be happy with.  It gives him too much control, not enough structure, and plain and simple my son is not interested in school at all.  If he had his way there would be no learning.

I think my biggest problem has been that I've focused so much on teaching the fundamentals I forgot a simple but major fact; I can't teach everything all at once and what I do teach should be interesting, compelling, and worthy of my child's time and energy.  Sometimes the "fundamentals" need to be re-prioritized, or just changed completely.

I've wanted my son to be able to write and do it well, regardless of his attitude, learning style, and all other equations that don't fit into my plan.  I've wanted my son to excel in math beyond what he is capable of because I know he is smart.  Doesn't he know how smart he is?  His mind just hasn’t conformed to my standards.  (Dare I say a public school standard?)  So in order to get my way, I've tried to break him.  Poor guy!

My son is only interested in one thing - what is in it for him.

He doesn't see the benefits of a good education, and I'm not helping him by trying to cram it down his throat.  I've been telling him with good grades he’ll be able to get into a great college (he's not interested).  He'll be able to get a better paying job (what does that matter).  He'll have a chance for a better life (what does that mean).

Sounds like a typical teen, right?  Well it makes me want to lose all control; ripping out of hair, smashing windows, putting a few holes in the wall, but I digress.  I'm praising God that I'm a passive person, but I'm loving the images passing through my mind.  Anyway....

We've talked about being a good steward and God's expectations, but the bottom line is ~ he just doesn't care.  And it's sad to say, but it shows in everything he does.  God seems so far away to him, having to pay his own way is not an issue right now, and learning seems to be a waste of time.

It's just not computing in my son's “here and now” mind. 

For the past few weeks I've been working out the details of a new idea.  I’m changing his curriculum, and life is going to get a little rough for him.  But not by me forcing boring, uninteresting subjects on him.  Hopefully he will find more joy in learning about things he is interested in, and most of all he'll realize that having consequences for not doing anything is more of a time waster than an education.

To be continued…

Homeschooling with the "classics" - Guest post

Where the Really Good Reading Materials Are

Have you ever thought about having your child read the classics but didn’t know where to begin?  You could go to the Internet and pull up a list of great books for children and see story books such as Pinocchio and Treasure Island.  These are certainly enjoyable for students both younger and older.  But, beyond the classical stories and fairy tales there is a whole body of wonderful ancient and modern literature that is mostly inaccessible to the average person.

While we may want to read something by Adam Smith, author of “The Wealth of Nations” the average person has enough time to read only a few entire books.  We long for ourselves and for our children to be able to read the best of the best but don’t know where to begin and the reading itself seems overwhelming.

My parents, who were historians, owned bookstores that specialized in historical and often rare books.  Many times they gave me books as gifts.  I always enjoyed these well thought out book presents and recognized that I was being given tremendous gifts that most people have never heard about.  One of my favorite book gifts was The Harvard Classics.  These books are very expensive and most sets are close to one hundred years old.  One Christmas, I was given an entire set of Harvard Classics.  They were in relatively good condition, but were still old and musty.  I had my teenage daughter read these and she sneezed constantly while reading.

However, the wonderful musty books were not the best part of the gift.  During her book hunting adventures, my mother had discovered the Reading Guide to the Harvard Classics.  This treasure is so amazing I just had to tell you about it.  Instead of having to read through some sixty books, the famous editor, Dr. Charles Eliot created a calendar of fifteen minute readings, one for each day of the year.  He knew the literature so well, that he could recommend the most interesting passages without a student having to read all the way through the entire books.  Let’s be honest, not every page in every book is a gem, but we don’t usually know where the great parts are, so we have to read everything to find the diamonds.  That’s why I love this reading guide so much.  My child can read a passage a day and be exposed to the greatest literature in the world, in just fifteen minutes a day.  And every selection is a real gem!

What happened to my set of Harvard Classics?  Sadly, I had to get rid of them.  I could not read them without sneezing and getting headaches.  I thought about replacing them but hesitated because they are so expensive to replace.  Besides, like you, I just don’t have room in my house for all the books I would like to own.  These books took up two entire shelves of precious space!

Now here is the exciting part!  I discovered not only the Reading Guide online, but also, the entire suggested passages to print or read online!  For FREE, and without having to handle old musty books, you can have your child read something really important for just fifteen minutes every day. If you only read four days a week, there are enough selections to last almost two years.  These passages also make great material for assigning writing projects.

Even though I use some great literature books, these reading selections are a thousand times better. I recommend these classical reading selections for students who are fairly good readers ages thirteen through eighteen years old.  Or, consider reading each daily selection aloud to the entire family.  So, here is the link to start you on a journey of great classical literature for you and your children’s education and entertainment.

The Harvard Classics: Fifteen Minutes a Day Reading Guide

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Randi St. Denis is an educator, popular homeschool speaker, and a seasoned homeschooling mom. Randi works as a consultant to public, private, and homeschool families; providing teaching expertise and assistance for all types of children. You can visit her website at ChicagoHomeschoolExpo.com.

Source: http://www.homeschool-articles.com/where-the-really-good-reading-materials-are/

photo credit: Thomas Hawk

It is not the day when the wolf will live with the lamb, yet

I was over at Simple Homeschool reading a post by Sarah about homeschool critics and our responses.  It was quite interesting, and I don't necessarily disagree with most of what she wrote.  I shared a comment about my struggle with this issue as a single parent and a link to my declaration of why I have chosen to homeschool.

When you make a declaration this clear and concise you should expect a comment like this: 

"I understand your choice works for *YOU and YOURS*. By what you type,
it seems as if you are saying that no Bible-believing Christian should
send their child to public school. While our children may face
temptation there, don't you also think they can be a light to others? I
think Christian children in our public school system can be a powerful
witness. My own husband brought others to Christ with his public high
school interactions with others. I'm just asking, don't be so quick to
dismiss other educational choices for Christians."  Mara

I'm overjoyed to share my reply in a thoughtful, gracious manner, and with the right seasoning.

I clearly state in my declaration, "In public schools my son is compelled to interact with 'strange children' who do not have the same biblical priorities that he does.  Without meaning to do so, these other children expose him to wickedness that he is not equipped to handle."

My son is still in elementary school grade and completely unable to handle situations where he would need to defend his spiritual beliefs with other students, or teachers who would have authority over him.  There may come a time (in high school) where this won't be an issue, but for now I take comfort that my little lamb is protected from the wolves.

I do believe that "Bible-believing Christians" do their children a disfavor by sending them off to play and learn with the carnivorous wolves who are being taught by parents and society to devour their very kind.  Sure a wolf pup is just as cute as a lamb, but that doesn't mean I want them getting too comfortable with each others company.  In this world one is a predator and the other prey.  The reality is we don't live in the Garden of Eden. 

Evil is prevalent, and we have no business asking our children go to battle at such a young age.  Compromises are being made in textbooks, in the descriptions of a God-intended family unit, and what some would call necessary tolerance.  There may be many "Bible-believing Christians" with children in public school, but Bible-living Christians are becoming the minority.

Romans 12:2  And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the
renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and
acceptable, and perfect, will of God.

1 John 2:16-17  For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the
lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of
the world. And the world passeth away, and the lust thereof: but he
that doeth the will of God abideth forever.

I have no tolerance for public school textbooks slanted towards evolution and natural selection as truth and not theory.  I have no tolerance for a system that believes the Ten Commandments does not apply in today's "politically correct" society.  I will not support an entity that tries to undermine parental rights in any way.

There are those rare and unique children whose lights are beacons.  My son's light, and maybe your child's, might not be strong enough to overcome what the world would throw at them.  Do you really want their light snuffed out because you were hoping they could be a witness to the world?  Sorry, but I'm just not willing to take that chance.

Psalms 34:11 Come, ye children, hearken unto me: I will teach you the fear of the LORD.

I've been given an awesome responsibility raising my son.  I will teach him to fear the Lord by example.  I will trust in God to guide me.  For we all stand alone on the day of judgement.

Ohio Supreme Court Hears Case of Science Teacher Fired for Questioning Evolution

Raising Adults; the Importance of Character and Employable Skills - Guest Post

It is critical to ensure that children are receiving an entire education- not only the 3 R's but also the abilities necessary to become productive and successful adult.

As homeschoolers, we value the freedom we enjoy to teach what we judge to be the most important.  In Texas, we are technically only required to teach reading, writing, arithmetic, and Civics.  However, I think most of us teach far more than is technically required as the lowest minimum standard.

Today, when I say 'life skills' I don't refer to laundry, grocery shopping, and measuring ingredients. I think more along the lines of

• independent problem solving
• managing tasks
• respect for authority
• eliminating the unnecessary info
• working alone productively
• managing deadlines
• finding solutions

When I have had job interviews, talked to managers about their employees, or read articles about 'what employers want' etc, I find common threads.  The young people that we as a nation are launching into the workforce are unprepared.  Even if we completely disregard their academic abilities (such as making change, writing decent memos, and other education-derived tasks) they are terribly unfit for almost any employment.

They are unable to work independently, moving from task to task without lolling about on the internet or at the proverbial water cooler.  If they run into an obstacle, they don't problem-solve to continue with their task. They cannot sift through extra information to find an answer, they have a short attention span when confronted with a challenge, in short they are without the training necessary to work productively.

We must be vigilant to ensure that the associated tasks of an entire education are being met (such as the list above).  We must invest the time at the kitchen table going over work, doing flashcards, demanding rewrites, and raising the bar of requirements for each child's education.  We are raising future adults, not children. This will ensure educational goals are met, so it becomes a lifestyle to write and meet goals, to break up tasks into manageable chunks, to pay attention, to respect authority, to solve problems.

This is what is needed today! Whether you homeschool or supplement a public education, you must own and be responsible for the shape of your child's abilities. Your child has complete freewill after he leaves the house.  But before that day, you must demand your child learn the other set of skills that makes a productive and capable worker.

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Teresa Dear is a homeschooling mother of four. She and her husband of eleven years are not worried about the socialization of their children. You can follow the blog exploration of classical education in general and their homeschool lifestyle in particular at http://highereducation-mama4x.blogspot.com She divides her time between education, the house, the extra-curricular activities, shopping for curriculum, and stocking her http://www.mama4x.etsy.com storefront, where you can find handmade greeting cards and vintage ephemera.

Source: http://www.homeschool-articles.com/raising-adults-the-importance-of-character-and-employable-skills/

photo credit: Foxtongue

Homeschool Mother's Journal

In my life this week…

Do you ever feel like the road of life is just full of potholes?  You spend all your time filling them so life will be smoother.  But some potholes are huge and take a lot of time to fill.  Then others are so small you think to yourself, "I'll just step over this one."  Then you find yourself neck deep in trouble.

That's been my week.  Trying to keep up with all the fillin' in of one pothole after another.  Skipping over the ones I thought were of less importance only to find myself falling in.

Ok, so I'm talking in riddles, but if you'd been here with me, sharing the frustrations and ridiculous craziness that is my life you'd understand.  I don't want to bore you with the details, but let's just say anger, tears, and sarcasm have been my allies this week.

Yes, I know sis, I will spend more time in prayer.  Thanks for the reminder ~ He is the way, the truth, and the light.

In our homeschool this week…

Our focus was math and writing, and though my son has been enjoying his other subjects, he continues to struggle with completing assignments in these two areas.  Maybe we both are lacking in discipline.  I have hope for next week, and determination to overcome this hurdle.

Helpful homeschooling tips or advice to share…

My email inbox is overflowing with curriculum ideas for preschool to third grade.  Even the recommendations for fourth to sixth grade are not very useful to us.  My son finds them uninteresting and boring.  So, I'm stopping the madness by unsubscribing from many wonderful homeschool curriculum sites.  Sorry but my inbox can't take it anymore, and neither can I.

I am inspired by…

This post at The Mommy Calling.  It was a great reminder of the truth, where to find it, and balance in my life daily.  (Potholes are opportunities for growth!)  

My favorite thing this week was…

"Mom, can I go with you to see grandma this week?"  (My heart melted.)

I haven't pushed my son to go with me to visit my mom.  There have been some issues with her behavior over the past few months, so I've asked my son occasionally if he would like to go, but this week he asked first.  I observed them laughing and hugging while I talked to a nurse.  They were both so happy to see one another.

What’s working/not working for us…

Our schedule!  I've made time for homeschool and my work, but we're falling behind in getting our chores done.  Clean laundry is piling up, clean dishes are being pulled from the dishwasher instead of the cupboards, and my carpet has seen better days.  I hate to spend every Saturday doing chores.  Why can't we seem to get them done a little at a time during the week?

Things I’m working on…

There are times when I would like to share random thoughts with you.  I'm very careful about what I write here because I don't generally like controversy.  But... sometimes I would really like to hear from my blogging friends their views and comments about certain subjects.

Some of you are sharing your views on your blogs, and I love to read them.  I don't always agree, but I've grown and my opinions have been stretched from all of you sharing your insights and opinions.  So I'm going to share a little more of my thoughts, opinions, and views on politics, religion, products, and more.

I hope not to offend anyone, but I want to be honest.  And I have to write to help me understand and grow.

I’m grateful for…

Anna-Marie and Tracy for their friendship and patience.  I could not have asked for better blogging friends.  You've been so understanding, and I appreciate you both so much.

A photo, video, link, or quote to share…

Homeschool Mother's Journal

In my life this week…

This was a scheduled week off, and boy did I need it.  My mother was finally released from the hospital yesterday.  Though she will continue to need an IV for antibiotics, she is feeling much better.  It would have been almost impossible to get any school work done this week. 

In our homeschool this week…

Ok, so I made my son do some math and reading this week.  Nothing difficult, for me at least, some flash cards and books that he enjoyed.  He needed to catch up on his math, so we kept it simple. 

Helpful homeschooling tips or advice to share…

Expecting a 9 almost 10 year old to do too much independent work just encourages them to see how far they can push the boundaries.  The fact he thought he could get away with marking assignments as completed but they weren't, and he thought mom/teacher wasn't going to check them.  Can you say BUSTED!!! 

We'll do better next week.

I am inspired by…

Home School, Inc.  We're going to give this a try to see if it will work for us.  I am using the Homeschool Day Book for record keeping, but it doesn't work for my son.  I'll let you know after a few weeks if this was a good decision. 

Places we’re going and people we’re seeing…

Still job hunting.  California seems to be the driest state for jobs, or maybe it's just me. =( 

My favorite thing this week was…

My very good friend Anna-Marie at Life's Adventures asked me to redesign her blog.  I had a blast working with her, and taking some time to relax and have some creative fun between my trips to the hospital.  She will be unveiling her new looks next week. 

I’m reading…

Proof of Heaven by Mary Curran Hackett.  I'll have a review next week. 

I’m cooking…

Chicken Fettuccine and asparagus
Swiss steak, mashed potatoes and green beans
Barbeque beef, rice and corn
Spaghetti
Flounder Florentine and artichokes 

A photo, video, link, or quote to share…

Do you remember Mr. Slim Goodbody?  My good friend Tracy at A Slice of Smith Life took her cupcakes on a field trip to meet him.

Homeschool Mother's Journal

In my life this week…

As you can imagine with all that's been happening, school was the last thing on my mind.  But I'm happy to say my son was as diligent as can be expected and completed most of his work.

My mother is doing much better.  Her memory of the past few days is spotty, and she's imagining that it was just a dream.  That being said, when she was informed of her violent behavior she was very apologetic and contrite.  Bless her heart, she's been trying to make it up to the nurses and me ever since.

In our homeschool this week…

My son did a lot of reading.  He is caught up on Bible study, history, and science.  Next week I've decided a fun project is in order.  We bought a kit to make a volcano, and he has been excited to get it started.

We will also be focusing on math.  Not much was accomplished in this subject this week, and I want to get him past whatever is holding him back.  It could be a discipline issue, or that he just doesn't "want" to apply himself.  Either way, that will be our main objective next week.

Helpful homeschooling tips or advice to share…

I cannot express enough how much I've learned this week to find balance in our activities.  We need to have time for rest.  Having too much fill our days puts a strain on our ability to focus on what really matters

I am inspired by…

Stacy, Julie, Christine, Maria, and the other nurses at the hospital.  They were encouraging and helpful in so many ways that went above and beyond their job requirements.  Since I live less than five minutes away from the hospital, I was able to balance my time at home and the hospital.  They were kind enough to keep me informed, let me get some rest, and complete some homeschooling with my son.

They took most of the punishment from my mother's behavior, and offered a shoulder when they saw I needed an emotional moment.  They treated my mother with respect and dignity.  Thank you to all of the Lodi Memorial Hospital staff! 

My favorite thing this week was…

Winning the Mega Homeschool Giveaway!  Wahoo, I'm still pinching myself about this one.  Out of almost 3000 entries I was chosen and won some amazing prizes.   Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!

I’m grateful for…

All the prayers, emails, comments, and support from my friends and family.   Problems come and we loose focus, but having a strong foundation of support and having God's hand in everything make situations easier.

A photo, video, link, or quote to share…

Homeschool Mother's Journal and Weekly Wrap-Up

In my life this week…

I blinked on Monday and now it's Friday.  Where did the week go? ;)

In our homeschool this week…

We fell a little behind, but my son accomplished something really big this week.

Living in California my son wears sandals, all the time.  While taking walks I noticed he complained about his knees hurting more than someone his age should.  So, we purchased some proper shoes.  Problem:  my son doesn't know how to tie his own laces.

At almost 10 years old this is unacceptable and was a major oversight on my part.  Then again my son picked it up pretty quickly, and we were out walking in comfort before you could whistle Dixie.  Great accomplishment, little man!!!

My favorite thing this week was…

Getting out and enjoying the sounds, sights, and smells of autumn.  We had off and on rain last week, so it was nice to have some sunshine and clean air.

What’s working/not working for us…

Ihover too much.  My son has his plan and resources, now I need to stand back and let him go for it.

Things I’m working on…

Our curriculum resources.  This has been a painstaking process, and I'm trying to get it right.  More later...

A photo, video, link, or quote to share…

How do you spend your days?

Are you out and about or do your children prefer to stay home?   As homeschoolers we all seem to be trying to find a balance we feel comfortable with. 

Of course it got me thinking about how much time we used to spend at home.  Now that I'm hunting for a job we're spending more time away from home and my son is not always pleased about that.  He has become a home-body that prefers the comfort of his four walls.

During the past five years of caring for my mother I worried about this even more.  Somehow I got the idea that his growth was being stunted in some way?  I wondered how he would handle himself in situations or environments he found uncomfortable?  Would he be able to act properly at a social event?

Then friends started pointing out how I wasn't doing my son any favors by continuing to homeschool him.  He is introverted and they didn't think it was healthy for him to be so shy.  Whatever their ideas are of how my son should or shouldn't be used to bother me more than I'd like to admit.

So, when my sister came for a visit this summer and we spent time away from home I saw my son playing on the beach, interacting with his aunts, and making decisions on his own without my input.  Even now he is able to talk with our neighbors, and answers questions from people we see at the store, library, and other places we frequent.  He has absolutely no problem carrying on a conversation with anyone.

I've realized my son will and is finding his own way socially.  Yes, we both would prefer to be home, but personal interaction with others is necessary.  We were not meant to be alone.  It's all about finding the right balance, and when presented our children will flourish.

8 Ways to Sabatoge Your Homeschool - Guest Post

The power of a successful homeschool journey cannot be over emphasized. Every parent who homeschools wants to enjoy the adventure, grow close to their children and have well rounded children at the end of it. But moms hold the power to sabotage their own homeschools and often they do not even know they are doing it. Here are some warnings (and remedies) for homeschooling parents so that you do not become one of them.

Warning #1 - You have no systems in place

How do you know this is happening? You cannot find your school books, the children cannot find their pens and pencils, your laundry is piling up and you cupboards and fridge are empty.

Solution - Take one afternoon on the weekend to plan your meals, do your grocery shopping, get your books ready for the next week and get your children to make sure their desks and pencil boxes are ready for Monday. Set up a laundry system in your home to make sure that your family has clean clothing and linens.

Warning #2 - Your children take forever to do their work

Some children are slow workers, but many are dawdlers. If your junior grade children are taking more than a 3 hours to do their work or your high schooler more than 6 hours then chances are they are wasting time.

Solution - Make sure you are giving your children short lessons so dawdling is discouraged. Ensure you alternate a hard lesson for a easier lesson. Take the time to train your children in the habit of attention so they learn the importance of giving something their full attention and completing work in a timely fashion.

Warning #3 - Your children spend more time on school work than life

If your children are spending more than a third of their day in formal academic pursuits, it is a sure fire way of producing burnout in mom and child.

Solution - Raymond and Dorothy Moore, grandparents of the homeschooling movement, make use of a head, heart and hand principle. They said a child's day should be balanced equally between these three occupations. Head refers to academic pursuits; Hand refers to work in and around the home like chores and entrepreneurial activities, and Heart refers to spiritual and moral training a parent should impart.

Warning #4 - Your children are allowed unlimited daily doses of TV and computer

Children should not watch TV or work on the computer everyday. It is an unhealthy situation as the stimulus that the brain receives from these two activities causes a dumbing down process where the child forgets how to entertain themselves, play out imaginary games, and be productively and creatively busy - just to mention a few negatives.

Solution - Make a list of all the productive pursuits your child can do and put to when they nag and ask for TV or computer games. Ensure you draw them alongside you in your day to day activities - and set the example yourself!

Warning #5 - Mom does not ensure that she is sufficiently rested

When a mom is tired, burnt out and running from play-dates to sports all afternoon and never takes a moment for a quiet cup of tea and a book, she is bound to be tense and overwrought. When mom has nothing left, she cannot give to her children and be a healing presence in her home.

Solution - Mom needs to set aside small moments in her day to take a breather. This can be a chapter of a good book, a walk around the garden, a cup of tea - on her own. It could also mean getting to bed earlier so she can rise before her family with a small head start on her day. Mom needs to take time out monthly as well, so she can set her hand to a craft or hobby where she can take off the "homeschooling mom hat."

Warning #6 - The homeschooling parents talk of nothing but their children

Does it seem like whenever mom and dad go out or have a moment together, all they talk about is homeschooling and parenting? While there is time for that, it is also very important they take time to remember their relationship ranks right up there in importance.

Solution - Make a pact you will do something special together, weekly or monthly, where you do not talk about homeschooling, parenting or household matters. Just enjoy being together.

Warning #7 - Parents control their children rather than build relationship with their children

This is a tough one... isn't it? We want the best for our children; we want them to be all they were created to be and to achieve much in their lives. But often a parent will go overboard and forget the reason they are raising children is so they can be strong valuable members of a community.

Solution - Like a young sapling tree, protect your children as they need it. Train them in moral and spiritual guidelines as you take hold of those truths as well. As they grow and show maturity in certain areas, permit them to begin making their own decisions within the realm of what is permissible to your boundaries as a family unit.

Warning #8 - A homeschooling mom who spend too much time feeding on other lives

I left this for last because this one point can be the single most damaging thing that can happen to any homeschool. When a mom is always comparing herself and her children to what the next person is doing, what the other children have achieved, the projects they are doing, instead of getting on and living her life with her children, she is bound to become frustrated and defeated.

Solution - Accept the season your family is in - perhaps you have just had a baby and an in-depth unit study will send you teetering over the edge! Perhaps your children have special needs and are not able to concentrate for long. Whatever the reason... accept the season. Also remember each home and family is unique and your family has a specific flavor to it. When you try and bring in another family's culture to your own, you dilute the beauty of your family.

---

Wendy Young is the homeschooling mom to 4 children aged 7 – 14 years. They have always been at home. She has been married for 19 years. Wendy’s website, Homeschool-Curriculum-For-Life,   is dedicated to helping moms choose curriculum, get organized, and enjoy the homeschool journey by equipping them as their roles as wives, women, and moms.

Source: http://www.homeschool-articles.com/8-ways-to-sabotage-your-homeschool/

This week in our homeschool

In my life this week…

Trying to get back into the swing of things has been difficult this week.  We've been organizing our school area and curriculum.  The clutter has been narrowed down to a point where one hour a week will be enough to get things in order.  Next week I would really like to focus on getting our routines down.

In our homeschool this week…

We kicked it up just a notch and completed more lessons.  I've noticed a huge change in my son's attitude toward school this year.  Of course there is still a good amount of whining, but it doesn't last as long as last year.

My son has been going to the pool regularly with one of our neighbors, and though he's not excited about me working outside the home, he's enjoying time with the neighbors.

My favorite thing this week was…

...a book I found in all my purging, They Beheld His Glory by Alice Parmelee.

Ms. Parmelee writes:

"This book is an attempt to see Jesus through the eyes of the men and women who knew him face to face, the people who became his friends.  In trying to present the people around Jesus so that they will live for us today, I introduce background material and permit them to speak a few words not found in the Scriptures.  Searching the Gospels for records of the men and women who knew the Master, and reading their brief stories with our imaginations alert, we find ourselves in first-century Palestine..."

Alice Parmelee has a rich knowledge of New Testament times, places, and customs in which she brings alive stories about doubting Thomas, Mary and Martha, and the Wise Men of the East.

The first story about the Shepherds of Bethlehem was filled with scripture references and opened the door for discussion on what's fair.  In that time the Shepherds were looked down upon because they were unable to attend Passover and the Feasts.  They were considered lowly, but God sent angels to tell them of the birth of Jesus.

This book is now our Biography textbook for the year, and I'm excited to see how the people who actually knew Jesus will come alive for my son.

What’s working/not working for us…

Menu planning!  I spent so much time planning meals for my mother to be quite honest I'm burned out on menu planning.  I've been wanting to visit all you wonderful bloggers that are posting about this subject, but I just don't have the passion for it yet.  This will have to change soon because I'm a planner by nature, and my son's health is a priority.  Don't get me wrong he is eating pretty healthy, but adjustments need to be made.

Things I’m working on…

The hunt for a permanent job is on-going.

I'm also still working on my son's lesson plans.  I have decided to split the year into three terms of 12 weeks with a two week break every 6 weeks.  Not planning too far in advance with the curriculum seems to be where I falter.  Life happens and I want to be flexible enough, but not too flexible as my son and I need the stability of a plan. 

I’m grateful for…

...my wonderful sisters who love me unconditionally, and support me in this crazy life.  They understand my circumstances and the hardships we are experiencing.  Caring for my mother's needs in a less hands-on way is still overwhelming at times, considering my options to financially support my son is weighing heavily on me, and dealing with my son's father is becoming a frustrating, heart-wrenching ordeal. 

I’m praying for…

..the Lord to see me through this time of struggle, and for my many friends and family. 

A photo, video, link, or quote to share…

"In an impersonal, fast-moving world where we feel more like a number than a person, it is easy to believe that our vertical relationship is much the same.  Nameless faces before a preoccupied God; busy people involved in meaningless, futile activity.  Not so!  God's Word assures us of an identity and promises us that our lives have order, reason, and purpose.  Let us live today with that comforting confidence... God knows what He is about."  Charles Swindoll, The Quest for Character

How was your week?