Getting punched, physically or figuratively

There's nothing like getting punched in the stomach.

It literally takes your breath away, and for a split second your brain shuts down.  All thoughts cease while the pain registers in your mind.  Your body instinctively goes into a fetal position in an effort to protect itself from further assault.

Being figuratively punched by someone's actions or words is not much different.  Your emotions take a similar position.  Your body becomes motionless, and you may even have that deer-in-the-headlights look in your eyes.  Not sure how to react, you close up, shut down.

Finally your brain begins to function and the upper-most thought to enter your mind is - Escape.

I was figuratively punched in the stomach early one morning.  While working at the computer, my son came from his bedroom crying his little eyes out.  He'd just awoke from a long and, what I thought, restful sleep.  I Immediately stopped what I was doing and went to him.  After fifteen minutes of inconsolable crying I tried to find out what was wrong.  This only produced a pained look on his face and more tears.

What could cause my son so much distress?

Many hugs and tissues later he was able to form a few words.  Through the tears he mumbled that his heart hurt.  He shared about being lonely and scared, and that he missed his "fun" mommy.  He didn't want me to work so hard.  He knew I'd been going through something, and I was angry and upset.  He didn't want me to be that mommy anymore.

Punch!  Punch!  Punch!

I didn't know what to say, so I escaped by avoiding an answer.  Without words I carried my son back to bed.  I kissed and hugged my hurting child, tucked him in, and rubbed his back.  I tried to sooth both of our hurting hearts by humming him back to sleep.

Afterward, I jumped in the shower, and instead of falling to the floor in pure and utter defeat like I wanted to, I silently cried and prayed.  I asked the Lord to forgive me for failing as a mother.  I gave my Father God my son's pain, and my own.  Then I asked for His help.

A few years before this I tried to fix my shattered life with glue and tape, thinking I had the power to restore it to some semblance of it's former condition.  What happened instead was a week spent in the hospital, away from my son, and a total collapse of my ability to function.  I cried for days until there were no tears left to cry.

The deepest depression I had ever experienced set in.  I was also diagnosed with PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder) brought on by my failed relationship with my son's violent father.  What I thought would be the happiest days of my life with a man who supposedly loved me turned out to be a living nightmare.

I ran for my life, and my son's, only to endure years of harassment and fear.  Most days I'm able to cope through working extra hard, or by "faking it until I make it".

Now every year or so my son's father receives a little too much pressure from the government for not paying his child support, and in turn he starts threatening me.  This is happening right now and I try so hard to keep it from my son, but he knows something is not right.  The letters started arriving, emails are flooding my inbox, and a court order will show up any day now.  To say my nerves are on edge is putting it mildly.

As a single parent I've done, and am doing, the best I can.  My son knows my love for him is limitless and completely unconditional.  There are times when life is just not fair though, and there are circumstances beyond his understanding that I have to deal with.

But some of the pain he is experiencing is just the normal process of growing up.

My son is also unhappy because the older he gets the more expectations are placed on him for increased responsibility.  He understands discipline will be administered if there is a failure on his part to follow through on those expectations.  He has chores and school, and during stressful times I am hyper-sensitive to chaos, clutter, and misbehavior.  When my son tells me I'm not fun anymore, I will admit it's probably true.  But I need him to do his chores and get his school work done.

He is too young to understand I'm barely keeping my head above water with finances.  My brain is functioning at an insane pace, and all the thoughts and contacts I need to remember is only possible if my environment isn't full of chaos.

I don't want to have to think too hard about what to cook, clean, or attend to otherwise nothing will get done. 

On top of all that, I'm in constant pain.  I have a herniated disc in my neck, tendonitis in my left arm, and osteoarthritis throughout my body.  I've also had excruciating pain in my left shoulder for two months, and I have no idea what is wrong.  Do I have time to take care of it, NO.

We're both unhappy living in California.  I've already made the decision that we must move.  But, and it's a biggy, I don't feel comfortable leaving my mother.  I am here to help with her health care and financial decisions, I'm available at a moments notice if she needs me, and my phone number is the only one she remembers.  She needs me, and I want to be here for her.

So, even though some aspects of our life aren't normal, both of us need to be mindful of what is normal. 

"It's awesome to realize today was in God's mind and plan long before this earth was created.  He knew you would be where you are at this very moment, living in your present circumstances, facing the kind of pressures you're enduring... and experiencing this moment of quiet reflection.  Bow and thank Him.  Turn over the controls of your life to Him.  Admit your weakness, your hypocrisy, your tendency to worry, your deep need of His presence and counsel in your life.  Take a few minutes right now to become completely preoccupied with Him... who has lovingly brought you to your knees.  Read Psalm 23."  Excerpt from The Quest for Character

My life is only beautiful from a distance.

Now that I've gotten real, whined, complained, and shared thoughts with you that I won't share with my son, I want to thank you.  And you can see my life is only beautiful from a distance, I hope you will allow me to encourage you.

I've been surfing the internet, reading post after post, and story after story from a lot of you who don't know why you blog, why you keep struggling, why you don't just throw in the proverbial towel.  I want you to realize that it's because there are people like me who may not visit daily or make it over to read every one of your posts, but we need you.  You make the world seem smaller, more friendly, and you bring the blessed joy of fellowship we need.  You offer hope, you're something to hang on to, and you're beautiful from a distance.

Let God guide you and what you write, and use your blogs to bless others!  You are a blessing to me.

photo credit: w4nd3rl0st (InspiredinDesMoines)

Think of your finest possessions as rocks from a stream

Does God need our help?  Even the wisest of us is not really useful to Him.

Does your living right benefit Him?  Does God gain anything if you follow Him?

Why does God blame and punish you?  Is it because you worship Him?

No, it is because you sin so much.  You never stop sinning.

Maybe to guarantee loans you took things from people.

Maybe you took a poor man's clothes to make sure he paid you back.

Maybe you failed to give water or food to people who were tired or hungry.

You have a lot of money and possessions, people respect you.

But maybe you sent widows away without giving them anything.

And maybe you took advantage of orphans.

That is why traps are all around you, and sudden trouble makes you afraid.

That is why it is so dark you cannot see, and why a flood covers you.

(Have you convinced yourself...)

God lives in the highest part of heaven and only looks down on the highest stars.

What does God know?  Can He see through the dark clouds to judge us?

Thick clouds hide us from His eyes, so he cannot see us.

You are walking on the old path that evil people walked long ago.

They were destroyed before it was their time to die.

They were washed away by a flood.  They told God, "Leave us alone!"

They said, "God cannot do anything to us!  And it was God who filled our houses with good things."

(No, I would never follow the advice of evil people.)

Now, give yourself to God and make peace with Him.

Do this, and you will get many good things.  Accept His teaching.

Pay attention to what He says.  If you return to God you will be restored.

Remove the evil from your house.  Think of gold as nothing but dirt.  Think of your finest possessions as rocks from a stream.

Let God be your gold!  Let His Words be your pile of silver!

Then you will enjoy God, and will look up to Him.

When you pray, He will hear you.

You will be able to do all that you promised Him.

If you decide to do something, it will be successful.

Your future will be very bright!

When people are brought down and you ask God to help them,

He will rescue those who have been humbled.

Even those who are guilty will be forgiven.

They will be saved because you did what was right.

Job 22 (emphasis added)

photo credit: Wendell

Look away from the world to Jesus

He who constantly depends on God through simple trust and prayerful confidence will be surrounded by the angels of heaven.

 

"For God sent not His Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through Him might be saved"  John 3:17

Reason and imagination should be touched with the life giving power of Christ.  There are great and precious truths that demand our contemplation, in order that we may have a sound foundation for our faith by having a correct knowledge of God.  The seekers for truth need to learn that the world by wisdom only, however much acquired, did not know God.

He who lives by faith seeking truth in Christ will be strengthened.

Recently there was a debate, evolution vs creationism.  Have you heard about it?

After watching the debate a friend questioned whether it was acceptable for her to be a Christian and still believe in evolution.  My answer would be that there's so many reasons why it is not, but let's start with what is truly important.

Many people say, "I'm a Christian", but what they really mean is, "I'm morally and ideologically a good person."  Well, let's take a look at the definition of a Christian.  The basic meaning of the word is "Christlike", or like Christ!

When I read about Jesus Christ and what He said and did, I cannot fathom calling myself "Christlike".  It seems a bit presumptuous, and oh boy do I fall short...  but don't we all?

So, can you or I ever call ourselves Christlike?  Now some of you may point to great teachers, philosophers, theologians, maybe even a few saints, who could fit the bill as a Christian.  For me Mother Theresa comes the closest to fulfilling much of what being "Christlike" entails, but even she expressed having doubts.

Jesus believed He was made in God's image.  How can you say you are a Christian, or like Christ, and also believe you came into being from some other form by evolution.  It is contradictory.  You cannot embrace both and call yourself a Christian.

So God created human beings in his own image. In the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.  Genesis 1:27

On the other hand if you want to call yourself a believer of God and a believer of evolution then by all means.  We're given the opportunity to choose, that's what free will is, but I caution you on accepting this premise as acceptable to God.

The wrath of God is being revealed from heaven against all the godlessness and wickedness of people, who suppress the truth by their wickedness, since what may be known about God is plain to them, because God has made it plain to them. For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that people are without excuse. Romans 1:18-20

Some say that you can't be a scientist if you believe in the Bible so literally.  Or that all new discovery and future technology will come to a halt if creationist beliefs are allowed to prevail.  I would disagree and tell you that is a pretty closed minded attitude.

I thought scientists had open minds?  Maybe I was wrong.  My trust and faith in God gives me a whole universe to discover, and with the mind of Christ the possibilities are endless.

photo credit: sofi01

Freedom of Choice

"One of God's greatest gifts to man is freedom of choice. At an early period in the journey through life, man finds himself at a crossroad where he must choose one of two great highways-the right, leading to progress and happiness; and the wrong, leading to retardation and sorrow. There exists this eternal law that each human soul, through the choices he makes, will shape his own destiny. Our success or failure, peace or discontent, happiness or misery, depend on the choices we make each day." --N. Eldon Tanner

I read that and can't help but think of all that has gone on this past year.  The intolerance, judgment, and complete lack of sensitivity on all sides of any issue that has arisen.  Then I looked up the definition of retardation -

The condition of being relatively slow in mental, emotional, or physical development.  The extent to which something is held back or delayed.

Our country is literally being held back and delayed from recovery and greatness by a liberal mindset of a utopian society.  It's completely insane to think everyone can be taken care of, especially when you have individuals who think they're entitled to be cared for.  Liberals think conservatives are cold-hearted, and conservatives think liberals are misguided.  We are a retarded country and the whole world is watching us fall apart.

Whether you agree with liberals or with conservatives the issues need to be resolved.  Liberals are the worst offenders of taking from people what they have no business taking, and conservatives have a responsibility to stop taking advantage of a system just to get rich or fulfill their selfish desires.

Americans need jobs!  Everything else should be put on a back burner until that issue is addressed.

In the meantime, what can you do?  How's your devotion to God?  What are your eyes focused on?  How's your pray time?

You can make a lot of changes in your life and the lives of people around you just by focusing on what really matters.  Get out of the social world of Facebook, and get back in to what is happening in your community.  If you don't like what someone says, does, or believes then stop listening or watching.  Turn the television off and spend more time with family and friends in prayer and devotion to God.  Find your path, shape your destiny on God's plan.  MAKE A CHOICE!!!

Please share your comments and/or opinions.

What is Christmas really about?

Jo Princess-Warrior is on a little blogging break, but she re-posted an article she wrote last December that I couldn't agree with more.

I remember an argument I had with my father about this very subject.  I was eighteen years old, and he was insistent that my children would be taught his beliefs about Santa.  I thought he was being quite presumptuous about what my children would and/or would not be taught.

He was angry with me, and I was upset with him.  I could not make him understand it would be my decision not to lie to my children about Santa.  I wanted them to focus on the reason for the season and not the hyped up commercialization.  The hurt feelings and separation this created in our relationship wasn't worth it.

For God is not a God of disorder but of peace—as in all the congregations of the Lord’s people.  1 Corinthians 14:33

The real reason for the disagreement was my contempt for this man, my father, who walked out on us some years before.  He returned that year for reasons of his own, but I could not forgive him.  This disagreement opened the door for my self-righteous judgment of him.  I showed disrespect and animosity because of my pain.  I wanted to put him in his place, and put to rest any idea he may have had that he gave up his right to guide and direct me.  I was not willing to submit to my earthly father.

“Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise— “so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth."  Ephesians 6:2-3

Now the world would say I had every reason to not honor my father, but a follower of Christ knows better.  In that moment, that precious squandered moment, I had an opportunity to love like Christ.  To be an example of His grace.  Instead I hurt my father, and deeply

I never had the chance to apologize and ask forgiveness of my father.  I still believe in my convictions, Christmas is not about Santa, the tree, the true date of Christ's birth, or any other controversial issue some would like to make of it.  But Jesus is our Prince of Peace, and He came so we could have peace.

The holiday is about the ultimate gift given to mankind.  Jesus was the gift, and He came to us with a message.  It doesn't need to be crammed down anyone's throat, or argued about until feelings are irrevocably damaged.  Jesus is a gift to be accepted with free will.  As Christians we give glory to God by sharing His message in a peaceful, patient, kind, gentle, and most of all loving way.

For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.  Isaiah 9:6

That is the what Christmas is all about.

photo credit: Alesa Dam

Will There be Faith book review

I was asked again to join the TLC Book Tours to review a free copy of Will There be Faith?  I was excited to receive this book as it is a subject I enjoy: How can we bring Faith back into education?

'Will There be Faith? supposedly offers a new vision that can enable parents and teachers to embrace their responsibility for religious education in our time and, with the help of God's grace, to fulfill it well.  It proposes an approach that is contemporary, natural, holistic, and flexible.  He summarizes it quite simply as "bringing life to Faith and Faith to Life."'

Unfortunately, Thomas H. Groome misses the mark if he is attempting to reach "parents and teachers" as he suggests from his introduction.  To be quite honest I was barely able to get through the first two chapters, and only skimmed the remaining chapters.  Will There be Faith? is a difficult read, and is aimed more for a Catholic theologian audience.

His life to Faith to life idea is an interesting concept, and the questions Groome poses for reflection and conversation throughout the book are very good.   But, overall I feel he will loose most "parents and teachers" due to the boring, college textbook like writing.  There were times when I just wanted him to get to the point.

Also, I'm not Catholic so I found some of Groome's interpretations of the Bible to be in conflict with my beliefs.  All in all I think the Christian world would agree with Groome's ideas and thoughts, but he just doesn't present them in a way that holds much conviction for actually getting anything done.  And he doesn't try in any way to unite his ideas with others of faith who would like to see change.

If you would like to read more reviews about Will There be Faith? here is the list of the other TLC Book Tour hosts:

Tuesday, August 23rd: Young Catholic Mom
Wednesday, August 24th: Googling God
Thursday, August 25th: Ten Kids and a Dog
Monday, August 29th: A Catholic Mom Climbing the Pillars
Wednesday, August 31st: JonathanFSullivan.com
Thursday, September 1st: Catechesis in the Third Millenium
Friday, September 2nd: Mom’s Mustard Seeds
Tuesday, September 6th: Joy in this Journey
Thursday, September 8th: Catechist’s Journey
Friday, September 9th: Building Cathedrals
Monday, September 12th: My Heart’s Desire
Friday, September 16th: Raising Little Saints

The other side of the fence

Are you gazing at that fence wishing you were on the other side?

I know sometimes I do.  Do you wonder how and why other bloggers are successful?  Do you see their followers and wish you had more?  Sometimes I feel that way too.

Do you feel the need to buy the latest, greatest homeschool curriculum because everyone else is raving about it?  Are you thinking your furniture, car, house, clothing, are not good enough or big enough?  Is your house not as clean as the next persons?

Envy and jealousy are deadly in the life of a Christian.

"A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones."  Proverbs 14:30

Envy is a disease that disturbs the mind and consumes the body.  It exists in almost everyone.  Some can even become physically ill because of it.

"Anger is cruel and fury overwhelming, but who can stand before jealousy?"  Proverbs 27:4

Envy is relentless in its pursuit of the heart.  It works continually, taking no holiday.  It is hatred without a cure.  It blurs our vision of truth, and prevents us from living our life truly in Him.  It takes our eyes from the blessings of His glory, and disengages the thankful heart.  It stops love in it's tracks.

"But if you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast about it or deny the truth.  Such “wisdom” does not come down from heaven but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice."  James 3:14-16

We must learn to control this deadly weapon ~ Envy.  How?  Pray sincerely for the one whom you are envious.  Live a mature and victorious life in Christ striving to be more of what God wants you to be ~ Women of Noble Character!

Do you remember this one?

I Am Thankful For...

...the mess to clean after a party because it means I have been surrounded by friends.

...the taxes I pay because it means that I am employed.

...the clothes that fit a little too snug because it means I have enough to eat.

...my shadow who watches me work because it means I am out in the sunshine.

...a lawn that needs mowing, windows that need cleaning and gutters that need fixing because it means that I have a home.

...the spot I find at the far end of the parking lot because it means I am capable of walking.

...all the complaining I hear about our government because it means we have freedom of speech.

...my huge heating bill because it means that I am warm.

...the lady behind me in church who sings off key because it means I can hear.

...the piles of laundry and ironing because it means my loved ones are nearby.

...the alarm that goes off in the early morning hours because it means that I'm alive.

...weariness and aching muscles at the end of the day because it means I have been productive.

Family Circle - November 1999

For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways

Since my last post seems to be lost in Blogger oblivion I wanted to share this post.  It has been a subject heavy on my heart for some time, but the words haven't come to express myself properly.  Jessica wrote it perfectly.

Some subjects are difficult, but they need to be discussed.  When I read Jessica's post I felt the love and heart-felt yearning of a true Christian woman of noble character.  I tend to shy away from controversy on my blog, not wanting to upset readers.  I believe everyone has a right to their opinion.  But, when one proclaims the desire to live a Christ-like existence there is no absence of controversy.

Humans are drawn to discourse.  This paragraph from Jessica's post states perfectly what I have been wanting to share, and how we are "more cruel than generous" in our discourse:

"We in the Christian faith have become known more for our outright rejection of others and each other, our stubborn refusal to discuss with openness and our lack of generosity. We eat our own. We expect others to grant to us a common courtesy we ourselves are not willing to give. Patience. Support. Thoughtful word. Silent listening. Embracing each other as human beings first whether we agree or disagree. We are called to love. To love God. To love fellow man. We wonder why we are ineffective and powerless... We have come so far down the road of needing to be right that we miss the fact that we are all wrong."

If you look at anything too simply you tend to miss the point.  God is complex.  The Bible is complex.  Humans are so multifaceted that to dismiss anyone, their ideas, feelings, or beliefs, is the epitome of dismissing God.  Did He not create us all in His image?

If we look at anything too closely we become judgmental critics.  Holding ourselves in higher esteem than those who truly get the meaning of "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and all your soul and all your mind." Deuteronomy 5:6

I consider myself an imperfect, non-denominational Christian.  My walk is with and for Christ.  He alone judges me, and I alone will stand before Him to answer for my thoughts, words, and deeds.  If you were to ask me my religious affiliation I would probably say I tend to follow more of a Baptist faith.  I am not one to agree blindly with any doctrine though, so consider me open to the Holy Spirit and more spiritual than religious.

I also hold the Bible as the full authority and truth in my life.  I strive to follow the laws given by God in the scriptures.  I do not see it as a book full of stories, half truths, or myths.  It is the Holy Word of God, and in it is the only truth we need. 

I pray that I learn to not turn my face from God.  That I learn to love my fellow man, and grab the chance to minister to the broken and homeless.  That as a woman of noble character I don't hide my talent under a bushel, nor hide my light for all men.  I will cling tighter to Jesus, but I will also search for Him more closely in the eyes and hearts of everyone I meet.  Love will endure!

Let me finish with the scripture I am meditating on this week:  Isaiah 55

 ¹ “Come, all you who are thirsty, come to the waters;
and you who have no money, come, buy and eat!
Come, buy wine and milk without money and without cost.

² Why spend money on what is not bread, and your labor on what does not satisfy?
Listen, listen to me, and eat what is good, and you will delight in the richest of fare.

³ Give ear and come to me; listen, that you may live.
I will make an everlasting covenant with you, my faithful love promised to David.

⁴ See, I have made him a witness to the peoples,
   a ruler and commander of the peoples.

⁵ Surely you will summon nations you know not,
   and nations you do not know will come running to you,
because of the LORD your God, the Holy One of Israel,
   for he has endowed you with splendor.”

 ⁶ Seek the LORD while he may be found; call on him while he is near.

⁷ Let the wicked forsake their ways and the unrighteous their thoughts.
Let them turn to the LORD, and he will have mercy on them,
   and to our God, for he will freely pardon.

 ⁸ “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the LORD.

⁹ “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts.

¹⁰ As the rain and the snow come down from heaven,
and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish,
   so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,

¹¹ so is my word that goes out from my mouth:
   It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire
and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.

¹² You will go out in joy and be led forth in peace;
the mountains and hills will burst into song before you,
and all the trees of the field will clap their hands.

¹³ Instead of the thorn bush will grow the juniper, and instead of briers the myrtle will grow.
This will be for the LORD’s renown, for an everlasting sign, that will endure forever.”

When you give to the poor, don't be like the hypocrites

We've all given to help the poor: a dinner to the hungry, a donation to the underprivileged, a dollar to the homeless.  Prosperity imposes obligation.  To have should mean to help, for the needy are all about us.  But, often benevolence is an act of relief for a guilty conscience.

It is too easy in prosperous times to write a check or dismiss our responsibility for caring.  Even the emperors of Rome gave generously on special holidays to keep the people under their control.  They gave bread for their stomachs and provided entertainment to keep their minds from discontent.  But they gave without love. 

Oh, the humiliation if it were ever revealed the motives for our own deeds!

Sometimes we give to others, not out of a sense of gratitude to God for what He has given us, but because of a feeling of obligation.  With each level of personal wealth we see many people who harbor a guilt complex.  This motivates them to give because of all they possess, but not out of love.

For others, giving is a means of recognition which is just another form of control.  Don't we hold people of great wealth in higher esteem than God who provided their wealth?  Actors, politicians, people of notoriety are put on a pedestal for giving out of a sense of obligation.  Greater are those who do not make it public their giving.

"When you give to the poor, don't be like the hypocrites.  They blow trumpets in the synagogues and on the streets so that people will see them and honor them.  I tell you the truth, those hypocrites already have their full reward."  Matthew 6:2

Jesus was a simple carpenter of no great wealth.  When the disciples wanted Him to send the people away because of their hunger, Jesus asked the disciples to give the people something to eat.  Was this a test of their faith or their love for the people?

Jesus did not want to send the people away, so He provided from the disciples own provisions of five loaves and two fish.  His love manifest itself by multiplying the simple fare.  Did He give from a guilty conscience?  Did he blow trumpets and shout in the streets of what He had done?

There is a quality of giving that can only spring from love.  It is neither an action pasted on to satisfy a requirement, nor an excuse to buy our way from personal involvement.  The love which is already present within us, because God is there, bears fruit in our sharing our resources gladly.

It is not so much what we give, but how we give it.  We can give without loving, but we cannot love without giving.  Love is greater than any act of benevolence.  Take Jesus' gift of grace and extreme sacrifice for what it is.  He humbly gave His life not out of guilt but pure love.

"I expect to pass through this world but once.  Any good therefore that I can do, or any kindness that I can show to any fellow creature, let me do it now.  Let me not defer or neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again."  Anonymous

photo credit: swperman

Words Matter

Words come slowly.  It's been difficult, day after day trying to form words to lift my spirits.  The constant interruptions are dragging me away from a desperately needed escape into words.

Since December there have been two women who have been in my heart and on my mind.  Many times during the day and night thoughts of them enter unexpectedly.  I stop and pray.

I search for their words on the internet.  Is there healing and strength in their words?  Some days there are, but others it is heartache beyond measure.

In my quiet time with the Lord my prayers are lifted up for so many on a list that keeps growing.  People suffering, hurting, just trying to make it one day at a time.  Then there are my own sins, forgetting to be thankful for His many blessings, guarding my words and actions, and on... and on... 

I had not realized how it was affecting me until my mother mentioned a difference in my attitude.  My temper has a shorter fuse, and I have shown very little sympathy towards her.  I love my mother, but it is getting harder every day to listen to complaints from a woman who has brought much of her pain on herself.

You see, I feel the pain of two "strangers" who are putting their lives back together after tragedy, and also hear constant grumbling from a woman who has lost faith in God.  My mother no longer seeks Him for healing, restoration, and strength.  The pills and doctors are her savior.  I am her savior.  She longs for us to give her what we cannot.  Instead of taking the common sense actions to rehabilitation she is relying on others to make her well.  Is my empathy misplaced?

The flesh dies a slow, bitter, bloody death ~ kicking and struggling all the way down.

This is how it has been for quite some time, listening to my mother moan and groan.  Her bitter, stubborn, spoiled personality is only intensified by her pain.  I know it is not kind to say, but I have to be honest.  She has been told for years it is her choices that will change her circumstances, but she stubbornly continues on the path to destruction.  At times there is the unwelcome thought that a care facility with people who are not so emotionally swayed by her outbursts would be better for her... for me... for my son.

So, the question is ~ DO WORDS MATTER?

I search through the posts of so many wonderful men and women bloggers who have been blessing me for months.  I search through the Bible for answers to questions I'm not sure how to ask.

• I can do all things through Him who strengthens me. (Philippians 4:13)


• "My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness." Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, that the power of Christ may dwell in me. (2 Corinthians 12:9)


• For this reason, I bow my knees before the Father...that He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with power through His spirit in the inner man. (Ephesians 3:14,16)


• He has granted to us His precious and magnificent promises, in order that by them you might become partakers of the divine nature... (2 Peter 1:4)


• No temptation has overtaken you but such as is common to man; and God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will provide the way of escape also, that you may be able to endure it. (1 Corinthians 10:13)

YES, words matter!  His words matter!  Your comments matter!  Your posts matter!  This post matters!

photo credit: Jim Blob Blann

Negative thoughts: God's positive answers

Do negative thoughts pop into your mind and rob you of joy?  Do you find yourself speaking those negatives aloud?  We may not be able to stop them from entering our minds, but there is one important truth we can hold on to...

GOD HAS A POSITIVE ANSWER: 

  

YOU SAY	GOD SAYS	BIBLE VERSES
You say: 'It's impossible'	God says:  All things are possible	( Luke 18:27)
You say: 'I'm too tired'	God says: I will give you rest	( Matthew 11:28-30)
You say: 'Nobody really loves me'	God says: I love you	( John 3:1  6 and  John 3:34 )
You say: 'I can't go on'	God says: My grace is sufficient	(II Corinthians 12:9 and Psalm 91:15)
You say:  'I can't figure things out'	God says: I will direct your steps	(Proverbs 3:5-   6)
You say: 'I can't do it'	God says: You can do all things	( Philippians 4:13)
You say: 'I'm not able'	God says: I am able	(II Corinthians 9:8)
You say:'It's not worth it'	God says: It will be worth it	(Roman 8:28 )
You say: 'I can't forgive myself'	God says: I Forgive you	(I John 1:9 and Romans 8:1)
You say: 'I can't manage'	God says: I will supply all your needs	( Philippians 4:19)
You say: 'I'm afraid'	God says: I have not given you a spirit of fear	( II Timothy 1:7)
You say: 'I'm always worried and frustrated'	God says: Cast all your cares on ME	(I Peter 5:7)
You say: 'I'm not smart enough'	God says: I give you wisdom	(I Corinthians 1:30)
You say: 'I feel all alone'	God says: I will never leave you or forsake you	(Hebrews 13:5)

 Oh, how He loves us!!!